At my job I have moved into a new position. I am now in charge of in school suspension. When I accepted this responsibility I was prepared to lay down the law and get these kids back on track. After a mere two days I realize that this generation of children are dealing with pressures that I simply had no idea of at their age. Because I worked mostly with primary grades, I was very unfamiliar with intermediate and middle school. Then last week the ones I did encounter were just a discipline report. Then they became human. They became people that my heart bled for.
These young men were wrong and should have absolutely been disciplined for their behavior but just below the surface was sadness. Their stories were very similar, lots of responsibility, mothers working to take care of the home and fathers are absent. So my approach softened because it wasn’t stiff discipline they needed, it was love and compassion and understanding. I knew I had a job to do. I knew that they needed to understand that the behavior they displayed could not continue but it was also important for them to understand that I believed in them; That they could be anything they set their minds to.
I went home in deep thought. I struggled with how to move forward. I wanted to be more than just a face of discipline. I began to think about my own children and the periods of their lives when they were acting out. My boys were missing their dad because his work schedule kept him away from home during their waking hours. Then I realized these boys along with this generation that is struggling needs mentors.
I would love to see a partnership established with the public school system that will reach out to these young men that are missing key elements in their lives. As a mother of two black sons my heart aches for the young men who have no real direction. I want to do more. I want to help them avoid being statistics. I'm not sure where to begin though. What I do know is that as a community we have to do better.
As parents we have a responsibility to raise our children to the best of our abilities. If you need help, reach out to your community or your village. If you don’t have a village, build you one. You have to be proactive in getting your child what he/she needs.
Parenting is not easy. I know I’ve been at it for almost 23 years now. I have had some very dark days raising my children. But I always had people in my corner to help me with them. Parents get you a team. A team of people that want your children to succeed just as much as you do. If you feel overwhelmed reachout. There is no judgment. Give our boys a fighting chance.